Instead of feeling like a crazed mess of a game, it becomes an infuriating experience where, rather than just doing stupid things because you can, you feel like you can’t even complete the basic tasks the game throws your way.Īnd worse yet, the insane charm of the game starts to disappear in a very short space of time. When the developers turn around and say they won’t be fixing these issues because that’s one of the main draws of the game, it’s maddening that they’d then ask you to fight these issues in order to complete a goal. Some of the objectives require precise jumps to achieve, which end up being incredibly annoying to complete given then game’s ridiculous physics engine, which will sometimes send you firing off into the distance for no immediately apparent reason. There’s plenty to see and do in the world, and it’s cool that the developers thought about the people who would be interested in more than just a dumb sandbox game.Īnd yet, I can’t help but feel that the gamification of what would be a very silly sandbox game is what makes it less enjoyable. And then there’s the alternate costumes to unlock, such as the angel goat, which shines in brilliant white and has weird eyes, or the devil goat, which can summon a red ball of energy to destroy anything in its path. If you’re really stuck for ideas, there’s even thirty collectable goat trophies to find, scattered throughout the world in hard-to-reach places or locations you wouldn’t think to look normally. Some of these quests are as simple as performing a single front-flip, but steadily get harder, asking you to spend ten seconds in the air in one go, or just plain ridiculous, such as trashing a certain stone circle tucked away in the trees. You can mess around as much as you want in the surprisingly large world that Coffee Stain Studios have provided you with, but for the objective-oriented out there, there’s a scoring system that tracks your activities and a collection of quests to complete. All in all it’s not a difficult game to play, but it can be quite tricky to do anything meaningful in. You can even enter ragdoll mode at any time if you choose, which supposedly aids in going higher on trampolines, but mostly just ends up with you lolling around on the floor, not doing a whole lot. It’s easy to get the hang of, although jumping can be a little imprecise, especially when you start bouncing around on trampolines and the like. More advanced movements are thrown into the mix too holding down the right mouse button lets you perform flips and spins (your goat is apparently well-versed in performing aerial tricks), pressing shift sends your goat sprinting off, and pressing R performs a special ability linked to your current costume, but more on that later. Moving around is fairly easy WASD covers walking and strafing, hitting the space bar makes you jump, pressing 1 lets out a baa. I ensnared a man with my infinitely sticky tongue and chased another man, screaming in fear, until he ran into a moving vehicle.
Two minutes later, I’d been fired halfway across the map after blowing up the local petrol station. Within five minutes of loading it up, I had become queen of all goats, and could summon dead goats from the sky to crush humans and trash the landscape. While Goat Simulator may not actually be an accurate representation of a life as a goat, and therefore not technically a simulator, it’s still a pretty fun game. And heading up this current generation is Goat Simulator, a game that really is just a joke that went a little too far. Is this some kind of elaborate joke that no one has quite cottoned on to yet? One would be inclined to think so, given the current trend of simulation games. Now, however, we’re inundated with the damn things, and people are just lapping them up. Less than two years ago, if someone had told me we’d see Euro Truck Simulator 2 on Steam, I would’ve laughed into my 360 controller and asked how they got into my room. Simulator games have developed a pretty odd fan base of late.
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